8 Private Secrets You Should Not Share With Your Partner
People in a relationship often tend to believe that there must not be any hidden treasures between them. Honesty and trust are the foundations on which a relationship is built.
While there is no denying the fact that a couple must remain loyal and faithful to each other. There is a school of thought which believes that no matter how close you are with your partner, a certain level of secrecy needs to be maintained.
This is not to say that you have to conceal or hide yourself from reality. But it is important to know, where to draw the line, when it comes to sharing details of certain things with your partner.
Not everything needs to be spelled out loud. You being in a relationship doesn’t discount your independence. One is not chained in a relationship to act a certain way.
People often feel obliged to share everything and this at times creates an unnecessary baggage between a couple.
We at Wishora, list out certain such things which are better not shared with a partner.
Having a slight crush on your colleague
We work in challenging environments. We work in co-working spaces. There are good looking people all around us. It is not humanly possible to not feel attracted towards someone at our working place.
People get offended by the very idea of even having a crush on someone, once they are in a relationship. But just having a passing attraction on someone doesn’t damage anything. Although, it is better not to share this idea with your partner.
Since, it might be just a fleeting thought for you. But for them, it would get completely ingrained in their mind. And they would often keep wondering what you are upto during your working hours.
How you felt about your partner initially
There are many people who end up with partners whom they fell in love with at first sight. But this doesn’t hold true for everyone. For those couples who initially didn’t get along well, it isn’t imperative that they discuss how they felt about each other in the first place.
This would create unnecessary friction between the couple now and this can be completely avoidable.
Uncomfortable details about your infidelity
Not everyone is comfortable with the idea of complete honesty. Even though you may feel relaxed that a monkey is off your shoulders, when you reveal such intimate details. It isn’t necessary that your partner thinks so too.
When you share complete details about how you once cheated on someone (intentionally or unintentionally) with your partner. It may take a toll on them, as they would constantly be thinking what if you do the same with them.
Specifics about physical intimacy
While few couples don’t mind sharing information about their past physical activities. There may be few people who might not be cool about listening to your escapades.
Oversharing is always a curse. Frankness in a relationship doesn’t mean you would share anything and everything bizarre with your partner.
Your Past and Present with your Ex
People may not be completely over their previous relationship. The world is mean, it would constantly remind you of your past. And there maybe a possibility that you might just for a moment think about your ex.
But to share this idea with your partner, about your patronage with your ex is not a good one. They may even feel cheated by the very idea of you speaking so passionately about them.
Flaws in your partner
The 5*5 rule applies to relationships too. If it is not going to matter in the next 5 years, don’t think about it for more than 5 seconds. Nobody is perfect and perfection itself is a myth.
So why do we expect our partners to be a certain way and condemn them if they aren’t that way. Why cant we accept them the way they are. Once you stop bickering and complaining about your partner’s minor flaws and accept them wholly, your relationship will be enriching.
Details about an adventurous night
We all must have had our moments under the sun. We all have dropped our hats to have fun. This doesn’t mean that we would go on sharing the details about that crazy night which might make it awkward for our partners.
Moreover, it isn’t going to make them fall head over heels in love with you if you share how selfishly you thought a certain day
What others comment about your partner
There would be a set of common friends for you as a couple. But there may be few people from your either of your friends group. Who might not completely like you. They may have their reasons of behaving that way.
They may feel their friend is no longer their own since you have taken away him/her from them. So just understand their point of view but don’t share it with your partner saying, so and so person from my group doesn’t seem to like you.